Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
this must be what syphilis tastes like
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Randomize
