I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
