I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
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