bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
