Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
The beers last night were like the tears from god
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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