ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
