it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
