you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
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