just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
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Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
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I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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