fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
