So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
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