my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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