dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
