god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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