shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
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He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
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she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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