rhymes with "ouble enetration"
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.