you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
