you guys were way drunker than both of me
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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