that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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