Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
My day in three words: secret purse cake
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
