Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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