is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Randomize
