U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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