Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Randomize