So drunk its hurt
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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