Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
