She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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