haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Someone came in the potted fern
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
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