i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
He literally asked permission to hit on me
he's single and there are thong briefs.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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