your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
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