ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Randomize
