is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
