i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
