ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
