I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
you win again, gameday.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Randomize
