the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Randomize
