dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I party with great urgency now.
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