It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
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