You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
