I'm so fucking centered right now
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize