just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
