Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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