she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Randomize
