Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
