1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
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