Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
