At least make sure they are 18
Why
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
