There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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