Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
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