All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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