Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
